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OVERVIEW

Crypto Traders Googling ‘How to Unsee Portfolio Balance’ 🤦

Source: giphy

Before we dive in, here’s today’s crypto market heatmap:

Source: Santiment

And here’s a look at crypto’s total market and altcoin market cap charts:

Source: TradingView

NEWS IN THREE SENTENCES
Crypto News 📰

🤑 Galaxy Digital Forks Over $200M to NYAG—Terra-LUNA Bags Still Haunting Them

Galaxy Digital settled with the NY Attorney General for a hefty $200M over its ill-fated Terra-LUNA play, proving that even crypto’s big boys aren’t immune to spectacular wipeouts. Amid the fallout, Galaxy quickly changed the subject to their shiny new 15-year deal with CoreWeave, betting big on AI to distract from their costly stablecoin regrets. Terra might be dead, but the bills keep coming. Bankless.

📉 Nasdaq Wants SEC Approval for Grayscale’s AVAX ETF, But AVAX Traders Too Busy Panic Selling

Nasdaq filed paperwork for Grayscale’s Avalanche ETF, hoping to lure institutional investors toward regulated crypto exposure—even though $AVAX.X ( ▼ 8.69% ) just plunged 8%, trading like it’s 2022 again. Grayscale says the Avalanche network’s scalable tech is ripe for mainstream investing, but unless the SEC moves faster than Avalanche’s price recovery, traders might keep choosing panic over profits. Regulators move slowly; bear markets don’t. Crypto-Economy.

⛏️ Bitcoin Hashprice Stops Bleeding (For Now), Miners Still Sweating

Bitcoin’s hashprice stabilized after an ugly quarter saw miners’ revenue dive 25%, reminding the crypto world that securing the Bitcoin network doesn’t pay like it used to. Miners might get temporary relief, but margins are tighter than ever, and only the strongest (or luckiest) operators will weather the storm. Turns out “mine and hold” is easier said than done when electricity bills are knocking. CryptoSlate.

📉 Solana Tanks Post-Trump Inauguration; Apparently Presidential Memecoins Can’t Save Everything

Since Trump took office, $SOL.X ( ▼ 7.21% ) has shed nearly half its market cap, with SOL transaction fees plummeting 93% and validator revenues collapsing 98%. Turns out even a Trump-branded memecoin couldn’t stop Solana’s active users from fleeing faster than truth from a political debate. With trading volume down 87%, it looks like the “Trump bump” was more hype than help for SOL. Protos.

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TECHNICAL ANALYSIS
What The Charts Are Saying 💹 

Crypto’s technical structure is breaking down like an old Honda Civic with 400k miles and no oil changes. 🛢️ 

Total Market Cap Daily Chart – Click to enlarge.

The Total Market Cap chart just printed a textbook bear flag breakdown—about as subtle as a wrecking ball. If you were hoping for a surprise rally, you might want to go outside and touch grass instead. 🌿

Bitcoin: Holding Up, But It’s Making Me Nervous

$BTC.X ( ▼ 3.98% ) is losing the Kijun-Sen on the weekly Ichimoku chart, which means its next support is somewhere around the $60.6K level—aka the top of the Cloud, or Senkou Span A, for the initiated.

BTCUSD Weekly Chart – Click to enlarge.

If it doesn’t catch the weekly Kijun-Sen, we’re probably looking at the Monthly Tenkan-sen at $79,331 as a last line of defense before things stop being polite and start getting real.

Yes, the Composite Index and Detrended Price Oscillator are both moving up from historical support zones, and yes, that’s usually a signal for bullish continuation—but Bitcoin apparently missed that memo.

Price action is out here acting like a disobedient teenager ignoring every rule in the book, and the market’s just hoping it doesn’t crash dad’s car. 🚗 

Ethereum: Down Bad But Maybe Done Being Bad?

Ethereum is on track to print its lowest weekly close in nearly a year and a half. Which is, you know, not a great look for the second largest digital asset on Earth. But—and it’s a very cautious but—some indicators are quietly blinking bottom. 😱 

ETHUSD Weekly Chart – Click to enlarge.

The Composite Index and Detrended Price Oscillator are both crawling off their lowest readings since mid-2022. Price is also absurdly detached from the Tenkan-Sen. And if you know how the Ichimoku system works, it means they’ll (candlesticks and the Tenkan-Sen) come crawling back, probably with an apology and flowers.

What’s actually interesting here is the timing: next week marks 17 bars from the December 2nd, 2024 week. Seventeen’s not random—it’s an Ichimoku number, and paired with a Kumo Twist coming next week, you’ve got the potential for a hard counter-trend move.

Add to that the 120-day Gann cycle (often a bottoming structure), and you start to get the sense $ETH.X ( ▼ 6.66% ) has a high probability of doing something dumb… but in a good way. 👍️ 

ON-CHAIN ANALYSIS
Burnt Bag Briefing 🔥 

Want to know whether the bulls or bears are feeling the most pain today? Well, this is the place to look. 👀

24-Hour Liquidation Heat Map – Source: coinglass – Click to enlarge.

In the past 24 hours, 156,228 traders were liquidated, with total liquidations reaching nearly $456.33 million.

The largest single liquidation occurred on Bybit, a BTCUSD pair valued at $10.00 million.

Longs lost $408.14 million, while shorts were hit for $48.06 million. 🤕

NEWS IN THREE SENTENCES
AI, Stablecoins, & Privacy News 🕵️ 

💵 Linea Rolls Out Native USDC and CCTP V2

Linea becomes the first blockchain to upgrade seamlessly to native $USDC.X ( ▲ 0.0% ), boosting liquidity and security without breaking integrations. The update includes lightning-fast cross-chain transfers via CCTP V2 and institutional on/off ramps, enabling legit use cases from ecommerce to global payments. Circle.

🤖 AI Is Fixing Peer-to-Peer Lending—Bankers Still Busy Faxing Documents

Blockchain and AI are teaming up to make peer-to-peer lending and crowdfunding cheaper, smarter, and accessible to the billion-plus folks traditional banks ignore. Dynamic credit scoring via on-chain behaviors means even your crypto-skeptic uncle can understand how someone could borrow money without getting robbed by fees. Kava.

🛡️ World ID Combats AI-Powered Fraudsters; Government ID Checks Quietly Panic

World ID ($WLD.X ( ▼ 11.22% )) now offers AI-proof human verification, making it harder for fraudsters to spam marketplaces with thousands of fake accounts—without turning online shopping into a DMV visit. Platforms can finally ditch outdated government ID checks and restore trust, while fraudsters and bureaucrats scramble for new ways to annoy people. WorldCoin.

NEWS IN THREE SENTENCES
Real World Asset Tokenization (RWA) News 🪙 

🏗️ Polkadot’s Tokenization of Real-World Assets Means Your Grandpa Can Own a Skyscraper (Kind of)

Polkadot’s ($DOT.X ( ▼ 8.11% )) bringing tokenization to physical assets and infrastructure, turning Manhattan skyscrapers into $100 chunks and rooftop solar panels into tradable tokens. While crypto critics whine about imaginary money, everyday folks are quietly gaining real-world asset access, passive income, and control over community infrastructure. Polkadot.

📄 Story’s IP Portal Launches, Finally Making Lawyers (Almost) Obsolete

Story’s IP Portal lets creators instantly register, license, and monetize intellectual property onchain without lawyers or middlemen—sorry, suits. Built to end the headache of IP disputes in an AI-driven world, it’s basically a “no BS” monetization machine for content creators. Story.

NEWS IN THREE SENTENCES
Metaverse, NFT, & Gaming News 🎮️

🚀 SingularityNET and Star Atlas Pair Up to Give AI Skeptics Another Existential Crisis

SingularityNET ($AGIX.X ( ▼ 3.86% )) just teamed with Star Atlas ($ATLAS.X ( ▼ 5.84% )) to shove cutting-edge AI into gaming—giving NPCs brains smarter than the critics still thinking blockchain is just “digital monopoly money.” Star Atlas on Solana ($SOL.X ( ▼ 7.21% )) will integrate adaptive AI agents, immersive virtual companions, and smarter NPCs, pushing gaming experiences beyond anything traditional devs imagined. SingularityNET.

📝 QSTN Goes Gas-Free on SKALE, Fixing Surveys While Critics Struggle with Basic Questions

QSTN just launched on $SKL.X ( ▼ 7.58% ), giving businesses fully automated surveys and gasless token rewards, leaving critics to figure out why anyone still fills out their 1998-era feedback forms. Users earn tokens seamlessly, no wallet needed upfront—proving that even surveys are better on-chain. SKALE.

NEWS IN THREE SENTENCES
DeFi, DEX, & Lending Protocol News 🏦

🥞 PancakeSwap Simplifies CAKE Burn Mechanics

PancakeSwap revamped its $CAKE.X ( ▼ 10.8% ) burn system to highlight net deflation clearly, ending confusion for users. Now, CAKE burns transparently show what’s actually removed from circulation weekly, improving tokenomics for everyone except those who miss misunderstanding it. PancakeSwap.

🌊 Berachain Unveils Proof-of-Liquidity

Berachain ($BERA.X ( ▼ 1.15% )) just launched Proof-of-Liquidity (PoL), blending staking, liquidity, and incentives into a single mechanism. Users stake assets, earn rewards, and validators compete to keep things efficient. PoL isn’t complicated—it’s just smarter than your average hater. Berachain.

🍣 SushiSwap’s Base Trading Competition Returns; Non-Traders Wonder if OP Tokens Are Edible

SushiSwap ($SUSHI.X ( ▼ 8.86% )) is back on Base with a 10,000 $OP.X ( ▼ 8.78% ) token trading competition, giving traders another chance to prove they’re smarter (or luckier) than everyone else. A minimum $100 swap gets you a shot at leaderboard glory or random lucky-draw winnings. SushiSwap.

LINKS
Links That Don’t Suck 🔗

🦖 Ethereum Game ‘The Sandbox’ Adds Atari, Terminator and Jurassic World in Alpha Season 5

🔨 BONK Acquires Exchange Art in Bid to Preserve Solana’s Artistic Culture

😨 GameStop faces record short-selling surge as Bitcoin pivot sparks market speculation

🪁 Kite AI Surpasses 4 Million Users and 546 Million Agent Calls on Testnet v1

🕵️ Privacy will unlock blockchain’s business potential

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Author Disclosure: The author of this newsletter holds positions in ADA, IMX, COPI, MIN, AGIX, ALGO, ZEC, XLM, and NEAR. 📋